


find your way

by dcapo



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:21:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25051618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dcapo/pseuds/dcapo
Summary: where castiel disappears all of a sudden and cuts off all contact with the winchester brothers. when dean's had enough of it, he lets out all his frustration one night — and realizes that he might just be in love with the trench coat-wearing angel.coincidentally, on that same night, said angel makes a comeback.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 1
Kudos: 15





	find your way

**Author's Note:**

> hello! this is a fic i wrote back in 2015 and when i was very into the spn fandom. i haven't been updated there so long so please point out any mistakes! proofread this just like 30 mins ago LOL. also the song used to be one of my go-to drama songs but it's a really good song i think! here's a link to it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BR5Aq2dWmy8
> 
> anyway :~D 
> 
> happy reading <3

**__** __

_**Don't believe, the bridge from you to me  
Could somehow ever be washed away.  
Don't give in —  
Don't start listening to voices  
Whispering things I'd never say. ** _

Dean stared at the ceiling, thinking about a certain angel. He looked at the time and saw that it was already 3AM, and yet here he was, wide awake. It wasn't that good of a month for the Winchester brothers, especially Dean, who was devastated by a certain angel's disappearance, no idea of his whereabouts. He was torn inside but tried to keep his cool by flirting with random women, but Cass' disappearance had certainly affected his behavior. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked at Sam who was sleeping tight. The blond-haired hunter got up from his bed and grabbed his car keys. As he approached the exit and locked the door behind him, he made no noise that could wake up his brother and went straight for his Impala. He drove around for a few minutes, before reaching his destination -- an isolated place he'd go to whenever he wanted to scream and shout, letting all his pain, sadness, anger and frustration out. No one, not even Sam, knew about this place. He went out of the Impala, grabbing a beer before shutting the car door, as he leaned back against his car.

**__** __

_**There is nothing you could do to make me turn my back on you.** _

Dean looked up, his green eyes staring into the starless night sky, taking a sip from his beer. "Cass, uh," he started awkwardly, not sure how to initiate a message to your best friend that you haven't been in touch with. Especially when you're in love with that best friend, for crying out loud. "Listen," he continued, "I have no idea whatsoever why you haven't been responding to our prayers — hell, me and Sam have tried everything." He laughed, trying to blink away the tears that subconsciously filled his eyes that were still staring at the sky.

**__** __

_**You're never too lost to know where the road is,  
It could be dark, you could be hopeless  
But I'll wait 'til you find your way.** _

_**You're never too far to be forgotten.  
Here in my heart, I hear you calling.** _

"If you're hearing this," he said, his voice cracking up – not wanting to lose hope, "please, Sam and I, we need you — hell, I need you."

**__** __

_**So I'll wait 'til you find your way back home.** _

He looked hard at the ground. "I – I miss you, a lot, you son of a bitch." He remembered the times he shared with Cass, how Cass had stated that he and Dean shared a more profound bond than Cass and Sam. Upon remembering that memory, he took a huge gulp of his beer as his eyes found their way to the sky once again.

**__** __

_**Til you find your way;** _

Fuck, he missed that angel so much. He remembered when Cass first watched porn — he chuckled at the thought, a smile finally plastering itself on his face. He remembered when Zachariah had sent him to the year 2014 in where he showed Dean what would happen if he says no, he remembered Cass who was no longer an angel, and drowned himself in drugs and women. Cass, he hoped, was still the same angel he knows and loves.

**__** __

_**'Til you find your way home.** _

"What the hell happened? You just disappeared all of a sudden! And what -- let me guess, you're going to just appear again, when I get to move on from your disappearance?" He exclaimed angrily as he stood up, calming himself from looking at the moon. Sitting down again, he sighed, "Why do you have to be gone now, Cass? I've been trying to keep calm about all this for the last month and now, I just can't handle it." He gritted his teeth.

**__** __

_**'Til you find your way;** _

"We tried contacting Chuck, but he doesn't respond either," Dean rolled his eyes which were almost filled with tears if it weren't for his constant blinking to prevent himself from crying. "We've no other way of contacting Becky, too, since she doesn't really return our calls and neither does Chuck," he sighed. "Is this some kind of sick joke? Or a prank? 'Cause I hope so." On normal days, he would've killed Cass himself if he discovered the whole thing was just a prank. But he knew Cass couldn't do such thing; he was still an angel, after all.

But then again, Castiel was, and always will be full of surprises.

**__** __

_**'Til you find your way home.** _

Silence filled the moment as Dean was drank his beer. He tried to restrict the thoughts of Castiel — he wasn't going to be here, not any time sooner, at the very least. He could be de — No, Dean thought, taking a deep breath from the atrocious thought that had entered his mind. No, Cass is not dead.

**__** __

_**The hardest part is to just sit waiting —** _

"Well, I know you're not gonna be here anytime sooner," he said, finishing up his beer. "So I might as well just say these thoughts out loud." His lips formed a thin line before. "The hardest part of what I have been doing right now is that I've done everything I can, but you still aren't here. If I sat there and just waited, would things have been any different, Cass?" His voice started cracking midway, a tear finally escaping his left eye, followed by a sniff.

**__** __

_**My heart breaking for you.** _

"I... I think I love you, Cass," he breathed out as a tear rolled on his cheek again, before realizing what he just said. It caused his heart to beast rapidly at first, but then it gradually returned to its normal rate by the time he realized Cass wasn't there to hear that anyway. "Thank god you weren't here to hear that," he muttered, thinking of how Castiel would have reacted upon hearing what Dean previously said.

**__** __

_**There's an empty space  
Where I save your place  
Knowing that someday I'll look at you;** _

"But please," continued Dean, "if you're there, I'll be waiting for you, just like how you did for me." He glanced at his beer bottle that was now empty. "I'll see you soon, Cass." He sighed, taking one last look at the starless night sky. Once he turned around to go back inside the Impala, there was an all-too familiar angel with the blue tie and an overcoat beside it.

**__** __

_**You're never to lost to know where the road is.  
It could be dark, you could be hopeless  
But I'll wait 'til you find your way.  
You're never to far to be forgotten.  
Here in my heart, I hear you calling.  
So I'll wait 'til you find your way back home.** _

Dean's eyes widened, almost dropping the bottle in hand. "Hello." The raven-haired angel greeted him. Tears streamed down the hunter's cheeks, instinctively pulling the angel into a tight hug, who hugged back the second he was pulled in.

**__** __

_**With my heart still hoping  
And my arms wide open,  
I'll never give up this fight.** _

"I am so glad you're here," Dean hugged the angel tighter — he didn't even care if Cass had heard his confession. He didn't bother asking Cass with the questions that have filled his head for the past months that accompanied his sleepless nights. He didn't care of at all.

**__** __

_**I know we'll talk like we used to,  
And we'll walk like we used to.  
It's just a matter of time.** _

He just wanted to hug Castiel and never let go.

"Me, too, Dean," Cass smiled in delight, tears forming in his dark blue eyes that Dean loved so much. "Me too." Dean pulled away from the hug, looking into Cass' eyes that stared right back at his own green eyes.

**__** __

_**There is nothing you could do to make me turn my back on you.** _

"Do not ever, disappear again, and lose touch with us, you got that?" Dean told Cass, whose face was expressionless as usual — but Dean saw the soft smile, despite how small it was. Anyone could tell that the angel was happy and that it was all because of seeing Dean.

You could tell how much they loved each other enough to sacrifice for one another.

**__** __

_**You're never to lost to know where the road is.  
It could be dark, you could be hopeless  
But I'll wait 'til you find your way.  
You're never to far to be forgotten.  
Here in my heart, I hear you calling.  
So I'll wait 'til you find your way back home.** _

Cass nodded, the smile never leaving his face.

**__** __

_**'Til you find your way;  
'Til you find your way home.** _

_**'Til you find your way;** _

"I promise."

**__** __

_**Til you find your way home.** _

**Author's Note:**

> blub..... blub..... in short don't ghost people >:( kidding. 
> 
> any suggestions or feedback is highly appreciated! thank you very much for reading! ^___^


End file.
